Perhaps it is too early to write such a post and make such assessments, but here goes:
A lot of people have told me that 2017 especially sucked for them. A lot. From all walks of life. Have told me this.
I don’t know if I could say that 2017 uniquely sucked for me, in comparison to other years…but it has been this seemingly never ending catalogue of disillusionments. I have often felt like the Universe is pushing through a whole bunch of lessons super-fast for me to process; to clear things out.
I just told off a person who was like a mentor to me last night. I read just an awful lot of bullshit from this man, and didn’t feel I could make excuses for him or anybody else anymore. I don’t consider myself to be a huge liberal, but what he was saying was so obviously wrong—and so motivated from this place of financial interest and a blind loyalty to his circle—that literally there was this flashing sign in my brain going “NOPE!”
I have sung the praises of this man for twenty years.
And after trying to reason with him, I just wrote, “I respected you.”
And he wrote: “No, don’t you do this: you can’t go ‘I respected you’ after just a 5-minute online conversation!”
And I was like: “I’m tired of making excuses for people. Life is too short. Bye.”
Because it was so crystal-clear that we were going on two completely different paths. He was set in his ways with the tribe he knew; I thought that by extension of my friendship with him, I was at least an honorary part of his tribe, but it was suddenly obvious to me that I wasn’t. That I was never a part of his tribe. And that I was blind to a bunch of shit.
But I wanted so much to have this “hero” I could point to.
And that was it. I unfriended and blocked him. And I never felt a single regret doing so, even though it made things a little awkward in our social circle.
The point is…I really feel many of us are having a shitty year because we have to figure shit out. Maybe that was a redundant phrase. But you get the gist.
Just to digress:
At one point, this person told me that we shouldn’t look any further into the misdeeds of those within our social/industry circle because somehow it would damage the works of art that they have produced…like sort of ruin the memory, ruin our retroactive childhoods, etc.
But you know: I have a whole stack of old Kurt Vonnegut novels I got at a garage sale that I can read right now. I don’t need to fetishize one fandom or another as if it’s this religious thing that needs to be preserved. The website Open Culture has like literally one million different things I can read, listen to, and watch. For free.
And that’s one of the big lessons I learned in 2017. What do we put in our brains? Are we still hypnotized by the shibboleths of our youth? Is there some better way to spend the time? Should we be more proactive and discerning in seeking out and shaping our own culture?
More on all that in the months to follow.
More to read about on Butterfly Language:
The #1 Key To Significantly Changing Your Life For The Better
How Forced, “Unprocessed” Forgiveness Can Be Toxic
Getting Out Of One’s Own Way