9.1.18: Surviving Infinity

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“And when we outgrow any given set of conceptual pigeonholes we must always be prepared to move on, to advance from soul-state to soul-state, as Sri Aurobindo put it: and from illumination to illumination. For our purpose appears to be as simple as it is endless. We are, as the aborigines say, just learning how to survive in infinity.”
— Michael Talbot, “The Holographic Universe”

Looking through my notes, I see I had missed the anniversary of the death of Princess Diana. I did do some cursory research to refresh my memory on the various symbolisms and conspiracy theories connected with her life and passing; most gave me a degree of headache that has only seemed to increase over the years alongside similar endeavors.


It’s the basic dividing line (again) between the Literal approach to esoterism/theories and the Quantum approach.

Did Diana “embody” the qualities of the Roman goddess Diana (equated with Artemis in Greek, though of separate origin)? Well…let’s say, she embodied basic “Light Goddess” type traits. You’ve got your Dark Goddesses (Kali, Babalon, Hecate) and your Light Goddesses (Lakshmi, Virgin Mary, Isis) and Diana was definitely in the latter category; located somewhere between virgin and mother, perpetually giving, perpetually nourishing, our lady of mercy.

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Now: was Diana part of an actual elitist breeding program to create a human avatar of Diana with the express purpose of assassinating her in a highly-ritualized display?

I would say…no.


Do I think she was part of a subconscious/quantum “web” of circumstances and intentions to syncretize her to this archetype, complete with eventual martyrdom and deification after death?


But let us note for the record: there is a difference there.



There was a time in my writing career where I honestly felt I was being “roped in” to some sort tragic depressive “suicide girl” type scenario. I was writing a high-profile comic whose gimmick was that it was supposed to be symbolically about my life; and the only caveat I was given by the publisher was that my character had to die at the end.

Looking back on it: that was a pretty big caveat, man. If somebody offers you a deal like that, you better question it!

Do I think there was a conscious “conspiracy” going on? No.

Do I think I was being subconsciously “pushed” into an archetypal “frame” for the “benefit” or “catharsis” or “entertainment” of the Collective?




So the next (and last) comic I did for them, I purposely wrote it so that the protagonist—sort of also based on me a bit, at least my interpretation—was successful in life. I purposely wrote it to “counteract” the energy of the previous comic. Which I know sounds insane…unless you take into consideration the massive public harassment I endured for that previous comic (including death threats), which almost drove me to (wait for it!) suicide.

I’m not apologizing to anybody, man. I did what I had to do.

And every time after that, either when I was offered a new writing assignment or I was just writing for myself, I always questioned: was this story “pushing” me in a certain archetypal direction that I perhaps didn’t want, that didn’t “serve” me?

Maybe that does sound crazy to some. But I doubt Grant Morrison would disagree with me on this point.


“Mag!c gives us an excuse to create something from nothing. Again, this is not a supernatural or occult feat; writers, artists, mothers and fathers, architects and filmmakers, among many others, do this every day and some of them spend lifetimes perfecting the trick. Grab NOTHING in your greedy, ugly physical fists and make magnificent SOMETHING from it!

In fantasy stories or show-biz illusions, this work is symbolised by the conjuror who can pretend to affect or distort the rules of reality by producing ‘something’ in the form of say a rabbit, from ‘nothing,’ i.e. the interior of a top hat.

The Mag!cian ‘imagines’ something in his/her head—it might be a lover, a piece of art, a demon, a god, a road bridge, a child or a screenplay, and makes it ‘real’ by giving the idea a foothold and a way to grow or otherwise express itself in the material world.”
–Grant Morrison, “Beyond The Word And The Fool”